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December 3, 2006
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Everyone's an a$$h01e

Sun Dec 3, 2006, 5:15 PM
  • Mood: Sarcastic
No, it's true!  No matter how great you think you are or how good you try to be, you are an asshole in someone else's opinion.

If you eat meat, vegetarians think you are an asshole.
If you smoke, non-smokers think you are an asshole.
If you support use of animals in medical research, PETA thinks you are an asshole.
If you are an atheist, everyone thinks you are an asshole.
If you are rich, poor people think you're an asshole.
If you drive an SUV, Al Gore thinks you are an asshole.
If you are gay, Fundies think you are a pervert and an asshole.
If you are Republican, Democrats think you are an asshole.
If you are Democrat, Republicans think you are an asshole.
If you vote 3rd party, the above two parties think you are a fool and an asshole.
If you don't have kids, parents of kids think you are a selfish asshole.
Ir you are an immigrant, the natives think you are a lazy asshole.
If you are a white male, it's perfectly acceptable to consider you an asshole.
If you are American, the rest of the world thinks you are an asshole.


I'm sure you all can think of other categories, and yes I know I am making very broad generalizations and no, you don't have to say "I don't hate smokers" or defend yourselves in any way to this pointless journal.  Really this is just my thinking out loud.  Am I an asshole?  You bet!  Sometimes intentionally, sometimes as a matter of circumstance, but I fall into several of the above-mentioned categories and it's good to remember that you can't be wonderful to everyone, nor should you strive to be.  Life is short, so relax.  Live your life, don't hurt anyone, and let others live theirs.

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:iconsurfindamatrixstk:
SurfindaMatrixStk Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2006
ah but you are a cute asshole;)
Reply
:iconcolorfulspirits:
colorfulspirits Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2006
A good point and very true in this world of the politically correct ! You can't move. We don't need George Orwell to explain "Big Brother" , we live it in this day and age ! I am glad I am not the only one who thinks it stinks :) :floating:
Reply
:icontitimeh:
titimeh Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2006
your mind makes me laugh. :hug: thank you I needed it:D
Reply
:iconshininggolden:
shininggolden Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2006
Ha ha ha... so true!

Once there was a man riding on a donkey on a hot summer's day. As he rode through town, he heard all of the people saying "look at that cruel man making that donkey carry him in this heat!" So the man got off the donkey, and walked to the next town. There he heard the people saying "look at that cruel man, making that donkey travel in this heat!" So the man lifted the donkey onto his shoulders, and carried him to the next town. There all of the townspeople laughed "look at that idiot carrying his donkey in this heat!"
Reply
:iconnanaleonti:
nanaleonti Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2006   Digital Artist
[If you smoke, non-smokers think you are an asshole.]

Quite true. I don't hate smokers in general but I hate smokers who smoke in my face and don't respect my right on fresh air ;) xD
Reply
:iconaseariel:
aseariel Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2006  Hobbyist General Artist
nah, i agree. eveyone's an asshole, at some time or point in life. people suck sometimes :B
Reply
:iconthedreaming1:
TheDreaming1 Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2006
In life, you will encounter idiots, morons and assholes. When driving, you often run into all three.
Reply
:iconcaptan-creon:
captan-creon Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2006
If you tell the truth, and state how you feel about peopl/things, people think your an Ass hole. (thus, im an ass hole.)
Reply
:iconbewarecalamity:
bewarecalamity Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2006  Student General Artist
If you're a vegetarian meat eaters think you're an asshole.
Reply
:iconmr-taboo:
Mr-Taboo Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2006
I've always liked this line from Die Hard 2:
John McClane: I guess I was wrong about you. You're not such an asshole after all.
Grant: Oh, you were right about me. I'm just your kind of asshole.







.
Reply
:iconjondapicam:
jondapicam Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2006
...and if you're a Christian, they don't think you're an a**hole. They just persecute you and think you're a nut.
Reply
:iconersi:
ersi Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2006  Professional General Artist
Well, you certainly don't fit in the "white male" asshole category ;) Keep up your good work and all your good and bad habits and just enjoy life, as you wisely said.
Reply
:iconphotographsmile:
PhotographSmile Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2006
i always thought being able to be an asshole is pretty ffing cool.



ps. SMOKING IS COOL AND YOU KNOW IT
Reply
:iconathenatt:
AthenaTT Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
"Correspondingly, John (The Baptizer) came neither eating nor drinking, yet people say 'he has a demon'. the Son of Man did come eating and drinking, yet people say, 'Look, a man gluttonous and given to drinking wine, a friend of tax collectors and sinners.' All the same, wisdom is proved righteous by its works."
-Jesus Christ (Matthew 11:18, 19)

See, even Christ said he couldn't win. So what hope do the rest of us have...? ^__~
Reply
:iconmrcrapinson:
Mrcrapinson Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006  Student Digital Artist
what you just said might be the description of man kind since the begining of humanity
Reply
:iconlawrencededark:
LawrenceDeDark Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
Great journal. :D

I quite sure some people think this about me, but I don't care. :p
Reply
:iconkev2137:
kev2137 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
Hmm... kinda thinking what this'll look like on a t-shirt... :p
Reply
:icondamadelmuerte:
damadelmuerte Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
If you tell someone the truth and hurt their feelings you're an asshole. If you lie and hurt them, your a lying asshole :P
Reply
:iconserenafae:
SerenaFae Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
Well put, and you're right. More and more, I'm realizing that I worry too much, and just need to chill. If everyone could just say to themselves, "HEY! In just a few decades (or maybe less), I'm going to DIE. WHAT AM I B****ING ABOUT?!" the world would be a better place.

God Bless, God bless.
Reply
:iconamai-tora:
Amai-Tora Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
I strongly disagree with the atheist comment...

Not everybody<i/> thinks we're assholes. ;___;
Reply
:iconlockstock:
lockstock Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
Not everyone, but I put up a disclaimer. It's still a bit of a gamble to admit you are an atheist in certain areas.
Reply
:iconamai-tora:
Amai-Tora Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
I know, I'm only playing around. ;D
Reply
:iconthe-darkwolf:
The-Darkwolf Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
:D My father considered the sobriquet "asshole" to be a title of honour...

"Indeed, the essential quandry in seeking truth through one path, is that it will always be in conflict and sinful to any number of other people..."

Prince Sidahartha ... another asshole....


:giggle:
Reply
:iconlockstock:
lockstock Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
It's actually quite liberating, once you've been given that title. I feel such pressure to be nice all the time, and when there is someone who thinks I'm an asshole, I am almost relieved to go ahead and let my venom spew. LOL!
Reply
:iconthe-darkwolf:
The-Darkwolf Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
I can only imagine... :o


:threaten: "...oh no, boy... you haven't even seen from ASSHOLE yet!"


:lol: :D
Reply
:iconangelvs81:
AnGELVS81 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
hi, i dunno i you have already read it, but i've finished the beta of you in kiss Make-up

[link]

please leave a comment! :)

kisses

Angelus
Reply
:iconimpkat:
Impkat Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006  Hobbyist General Artist
I don't deny being an asshole. You can call me many things and I won't deny them. I'm human and I know it. I accept this horrible fact. Unfortunatly not everyone can accept this for some reason. It's quite hypocritical.
Reply
:iconlockstock:
lockstock Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
Thing is, most of us are hated by circumstance. So it's inescapable and quite funny, really.
Reply
:iconsinginlizzie85:
singinlizzie85 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
damn.. i was so close.. until you said if you're american.. i was almost not an asshole.. but it's ok.. my husband thinks i am one anyway. oh well.. but i liked this.. it's very true.. which makes me feel at ease for being an asshole myself.
Reply
:iconlockstock:
lockstock Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
Well, do you have tattoos or weird hair? That makes you an asshole too, apparently.
Reply
:iconsinginlizzie85:
singinlizzie85 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
hmm.. i've always had weird hair but now it's surprisingly back to the natural color.. anywho.. no tats yet.. but my nose is pierced.. and i have 5 holes in my ear.. i'm sure someone would hold that against me.. weird.
Reply
:iconaarrccs-revenant:
Aarrccs-Revenant Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
I'm an asshole because I want to be an asshole, not because some person or group I don't agree with thinks of me as one.

I'll not be regarded as an asshole solely because of what others think of me. I am my own asshole.

...well damn, that sounded wierd.
Reply
:iconlockstock:
lockstock Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
:laughing: That should be your new tagline.
Reply
:iconverciretti:
verciretti Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006   Digital Artist
At last! Something in which we all are equal!
:rofl:
Reply
:icondarkeprince:
DarkePrince Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
:) lol Nice journal :) Im 7 assholes :(
Reply
:iconlockstock:
lockstock Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
I'm 6 assholes.
Reply
:icondarkeprince:
DarkePrince Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2006
:P lol lucky you *burning with envy* *considering being a vegan ..... Nah meat tastes too good* *maybe a sex change ... hm nope wont do that either* so Im still 7 ass holes :(
Reply
:icontaniahenderson:
TaniaHenderson Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006  Professional General Artist
You are so very right =) I found this quote yesterday that follows along the same lines and made me smile too

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -Dr. Seuss
Reply
:iconlockstock:
lockstock Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
I love Dr Seuss.
Reply
:iconkagesan17:
KageSan17 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006  Hobbyist Writer
You forgot one:

If you are a Fundie, the rest of the sane population thinks you are an asshole.


*chased out of journal with torches and pitchforks*
Reply
:iconlockstock:
lockstock Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
Haha, that's true. A scary asshole.
Reply
:iconbj666:
bj666 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
motherfucking asshole.s
Reply
:iconbj666:
bj666 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
anagram for "assfucking motherholes" --- homesickness artful hog
Reply
:iconlockstock:
lockstock Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
assfucking motherholes. 8D
Reply
:iconfaeryfeller:
faeryfeller Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
:giggle: cool,so true.I tried for universal popularity...didn't work..so yay:D I'm an asshole too!!!
Reply
:iconfinlande:
finlande Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
"If your vegan meat eaters thinks your asshole activist" wich is sadly very true :(

And damn, im white male :|
Reply
:iconyellowphoenix:
YellowPhoenix Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
woop! im not an asshole!
Reply
:iconlockstock:
lockstock Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2006
LOL, well just take any of the above and reverse it and ... presto!
Reply
:iconyellowphoenix:
YellowPhoenix Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2006
aww shucks, im an asshole.
Reply
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